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Five Boosts 11/24/20 – Change Minds and Get Beter

Anger and hate - Fist punching through glass

Five Easy Ways to Make Your Life Better for 11/24/20

Anger and Hate Hurt You More Than The Target of Your Rage – But You Don’t Have to Feel Them

(Steven Ray Marks | Self Helping Yourself | 1075 words)

Anger and hatred consume your thoughts, mindset, and soul, while doing nothing to improve the world or change those you’re angry at/hate.

To feel anger and hatred less, and take ownership over your own happiness:

  • Minimize exposure to triggers
  • Build the mindset that anger is a choice
  • Stop complaining to break the anger habit

How to Get Better

(Mark Manson | 1425 Words)

Therapy helps because talking over problems separates negative thoughts and feelings from your sense of self, changing unhappiness from the subject to the object.

The same is true of journaling and meditation, which is why they’re effective as well.

Be Specific

(Josh Spector | For The Interested | 725 words)

Specificity forces you to be clear, focused, and unique. Your life will be better if you’re more specific about:

  • Goals
  • Audience
  • Communication
  • Requests
  • Success

Change Someone’s Mind: 6 Secrets From Research

(Eric Barker | Bakadesuyo | 3375 words)

To change someone’s mind, you need to get them to change their own mind. Be a respectful partner, not an adversary.

Ask why they believe their beliefs with genuine curiosity, not to find “gotchas” or attack. Ask how certain they are, and to make comparisons on a scale of 1 to 10. What evidence would change their mind?

And be open to learning from them and changing your own mind.

I found this article in Josh Spector’s For The Interested newsletter. (Josh Spector also wrote the “Be Specific” article above.)

Related: How to Win Allies and How to Stop Making Enemies

The Mistake Smart People Make: Being in Motion vs. Taking Action

(James Clear | 925 words)

Motion is planning and research. Action is doing and creating things.

Sometimes you need to plan and research. But you’ll never accomplish anything without action.

Often people get stuck on motion, thinking it’s productive when really they’re procrastinating.

Set a schedule or hard deadline to take action.

Self Helping Yourself Tweet of the Week

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I work hard reviewing hundreds of articles a week to find the five that contain the best actionable advice on easy ways to improve your life.

As well as writing the posts for Self Helping Yourself, and now Rockstar Excel.

If you can’t donate, you can always help out by subscribing, recommending Five Boosts, Self Helping Yourself, or any articles to your friends, or by rating/reviewing The Weight Loss Habit on Amazon. (If you’ve read it.)

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Five Boosts 11/17/20 – Good Habits For Productive Days

Five Easy Ways to Make Your Life Better for 11/17/20

7 Easy Strategies for Overcoming Seasonal Affective Disorder

(Steven Ray Marks | Self Helping Yourself | 825 words)

Like a lot of people, I suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Often advice for coping with SAD is exceptionally difficult to do for anyone suffering from it.

You aren’t going to exercise and do yoga when you can barely get out of bed.

Here are some easy suggestions, such as:

  • Assign a name to your SAD
  • Use a light-therapy box
  • Avoid windows at dusk

How to Network When You’re Painfully Shy

(Anouare Abdou | The Ladders | 1175 words)

Networking is important for a lot of careers, but a lot of people struggle with it. To get better:

  • Make a “win list” to boost your confidence
  • Prepare conversation starters and responses
  • Turn it into a game
  • Practice by talking to yourself
  • Be a good listener

I’d add: Don’t go into networking with the mindset “What can these people do for me?” Instead, focus on forming genuine connections, and “What can I do for them?”

14 Things My Highly Productive Friends Have Given Up

(Tim Denning | The Ascent on Medium | 1450 words)

Being more productive doesn’t always mean being a superachiever with infinite energy.

Sometimes it means eliminating things. Such as:

  • Automatically agreeing to give others your time
  • Overworking
  • Listening to ‘preachers of chaos’
  • Having too many goals
  • Being an a–hole

13 Evening Routine Habits to Perfectly End Your Day

(Connie Stemmle | Developing Good Habits | 2875 words)

A good evening routine sets the stage for a productive morning.

Suggestions include:

  • Establish a ‘shut down’ ritual
  • Plan for the next day
  • Spend time with your family
  • Practice something you enjoy
  • Reflect

How to Make Good Habits Stick

(Barrie Davenport | Live Bold and Bloom | 2275 words)

The way to make lasting change is through habits. But how do you build and maintain habits?

  • Start ridiculously small
  • Begin with one habit at a time
  • Have clear intentions
  • Celebrate small Wins
  • Change your mindset

#Self-PromotionThese ideas are similar to the philosophy toward weight loss laid out in my book The Weight Loss Habit. If you enjoy this article, you might want to check out the book.

Bonus Boost

Understanding Serving Size

(Steven Ray Marks | Self Helping Yourself | 550 words)

It can be difficult to know how much you’re eating if the amount doesn’t match up to what the manufacturer lists as a serving size.

Sometimes the labels are intentionally confusing, but even when they aren’t, it can be hard to judge.

Here I walk you through a simple method to figure this out.

Self Helping Yourself Tweet of the Week

Be sure to follow @YourselfHelping on Twitter.

Enjoy Five Boosts By Self Helping Yourself? Be sure to Subscribe and check out the Self Helping Yourself site.

Enjoy Five Boosts? Please consider buying me a coffee.

I work hard reviewing hundreds of articles a week to find the five that contain the best actionable advice on easy ways to improve your life.

As well as writing the posts for Self Helping Yourself, and now Rockstar Excel.

If you can’t donate, you can always help out by subscribing, recommending Five Boosts, Self Helping Yourself, or any articles to your friends, or by rating/reviewing The Weight Loss Habit on Amazon. (If you’ve read it.)

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Fear, Investing, And Impostors – Five Boosts 8/2/20

Five Easy Ways to Make Your Life Better for 8/2/20

The Incredibly Simple, One Sentence Guide to Investing

(Steven Ray Marks | Self Helping Yourself | 1700 words)

The one sentence is:

Once you’ve paid off all your credit card debt, invest as much as you can in your 401k, and park your money in an index fund without paying any attention to the market.”

That’s all you need to know about investing.

Anything more complicated will give you worse results.

The article gives more detail on why this is the case, what an index fund is, and how to pick which index fund, so it’s definitely worth reading. (If I do say so myself. 😉)

21 Ways to Overcome Impostor Syndrome

(Kyle Eschenroeder | Startup Bros. | 3100 Words)

Impostor Syndrome is the feeling that you’re not qualified to be doing your job, and that everyone will realize you’re a fraud. It’s shockingly common, even among elites and experts.

It’s hard to summarize this lengthy article, because each of the 21 diverse suggestions will resonate with different people.

But if this is something you ever suffer from, or you ever haven’t pursued something you wanted because you thought you weren’t qualified, I highly recommend reading this.

I found this article in For the Interested, which gives advice mainly directed toward online creators, but is useful for everyone.

Optimism 2020: A Manifesto

(Trevor McKendrick | How It Actually Works | 450 Words | Subscribe)

Fifteen suggestions on being more optimistic, including:

  • Focus on things you can influence.
  • Do something today instead of daydreaming about tomorrow.
  • Move fast. Most decisions can be reversed later.
  • Recognize the pie is not fixed and life is not zero sum.
  • Believe we can solve any problem.

6 Strategies to Overcome Fear

(Henrik Edberg | Positivity Blog | 1400 Words | Subscribe)

  1. Ask what’s the worst that can happen.
  2. Write out the fear.
  3. Change your perspective.
  4. Question your fears and what they’re based on.
  5. Breathe and take a moment to accept the fear.
  6. Take small steps forward.

How to Change Your Personality For the Better

(Olga Khazan | Next Big Idea Club | 600 Words | Subscribe)

Most people assume that their personality is fixed.

But you actually can change your personality if you want.

All you have to do is act the way you want your personality to be, and eventually your personality will change to follow your actions.

I found this in Nir Eyal’s Nir and Far newsletter.

Self Helping Yourself Tweet of the Week

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Giraffe Punching, Apologies, and Goals – Five Boosts 7/26/20

Giraffe Punching

Five Easy Ways to Make Your Life Better for 7/26/20

Stop Giraffe Punching to Be More Tolerant, Less Stressed, Have a Better Outlook, and Be Happier Overall

(Self Helping Yourself | Steven Ray Marks)

Giraffe Punching is repeatedly lecturing an audience that already agrees with you, or telling them to stop doing something none of them are doing, in a condescending and insulting way.

The term comes from it being pointless to yell at people to stop punching giraffes.

This is something that everyone does, when they get frustrated by bad behavior in the world and then take it out on the wrong people.

But making a conscious effort to stop will make you happier, improve your relationships, and improve your perspective on the world.

How to Talk to People Who Disagree With You and Still Be Kind

(Tanya Basu | MIT Technology Review)

I changed the headline of this article.

It’s actually about talking to conspiracy theorists, but it’s excellent advice for talking to anyone who disagrees with you.

Speak respectfully, privately, and test the waters first.

Find an element you agree on.

Use a “truth sandwich” or Socratic method.

Be careful with loved ones, remember that some people don’t want to change, and if it gets bad, stop.

And remember that even if you don’t change someone’s mind, every pleasant interaction you have makes people more open to your view. (Though unpleasant interactions make them even more skeptical of your view.)

See also: How to Win Allies and How to Stop Making Enemies.

How Good Apologies Enhance Our Well-Being

(Molly Howes, Ph.D. | Mind Body Green)

Being more willing to genuinely apologize after wronging someone will lead to better relationships and increased self-respect.

It also provides a good example for children, helping them develop a sense of empathy.

A good apology involves understanding the other person’s injury, articulating sincere regret, making reparations, and making a plan so it doesn’t happen again.

25 Ways to Dramatically Increase Your Chances of Reaching Your Goals

(Ayodeji Awosika | Medium)

Some suggestions include:

Write your goals down. Get quick wins. Don’t brag about things you haven’t yet done. Focus on one thing at a time. And align goals with positivity.

I agree with most of the 25 items on this list, but not all of them. I suspect Awosika would be totally fine with that, since one of the items is “Don’t be a self-help robot.”

So pick and choose the suggestions that you think will work well for you.

5 Habits to Take Action Every Day

Henrik Edberg | Positivity Blog | Subscribe)

Change requires consistent daily action. But it can be hard to maintain motivation to keep that action going.

To fight this:

1. Focus on the process rather than results.

2. Remember why you are taking action.

3. Remember quitting or laziness will make you feel bad about yourself.

4. Take smaller steps on days when big ones seem too daunting.

5. Celebrate what you did each day.

Self Helping Yourself Tweet of the Week

Be sure to follow @YourselfHelping on Twitter.

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